Quote of the Day:
Calculon: That was so terrible I think you gave me cancer!
From Futurama Season 4: Bender Should Not Be Allowed On TV!
Also from that episode:
Cubert: Relax, Dad, we just invited a few friends over.
Farnsworth: Hmm. There's something wrong with your story but I can't put my finger on it. [He gasps.] Of course! You don't have friends!